Closed minded?  Closed minded?  Moi? 

Anyone who knows me knows my mind is so open, the brain dropped out long ago and there is a little sign in there that reads, “This Space for Rent.”  The sign is cobwebby and faded by time and by the constant stream of light that shoots through the opening.  It’s also a little breezy.

I was listening to the radio (98.3 FM KTWS The Twins Classic Rock-duh) and heard a song.  The guitar rifts were outstanding and the chorus sounded like Queen. 

But being a dedicated Queen fan and knowing every song since I own every CD recorded, domestic and imported, and every DVD and even saw them in concert (Beloved Spouse saw them twice) I knew this could not be Queen. 

It was a new song.

Then, the DJ, Ron Alvarez, came on after the song and announced the song was by “Queen and Paul Rodgers.”

I begged to differ so I called in with what I thought was a well-reasoned and polite rebuttal.  Another listener called in later and said I was “closed minded” since he had seen Queen and Paul Rodgers in concert and they had “rocked.”

I have no doubt the concert he attended did rock.  However, the group he saw was NOT Queen.

Did it have Freddie Mercury?  No.  Did it have John Deacon?  No.  Q.E.D., the concert and the new single, C-lebrity was not done by Queen.

At best, it was Paul Rodgers and Een.  And even then, I’m giving them the benefit of the doubt and rounding up to give them that extra “e.”

It’s all a question of respect and in my opinion, some people, and I’m looking at you, Brian May and Roger Taylor; do not show the reverence classic rock demands.

Brian May and Roger Taylor are skilled musicians and song writers.  Together with Paul Rodgers, they have produced some really good new music. 

But, it’s not Queen.

The real Queen: Mercury, Deacon, Taylor and May, provided the best example of respect when I saw them live.  They performed Bohemian Rhapsody, of course.  In the middle of the song is the “opera” part and you know what part I’m talking about.  It’s the part that if the song comes on the crew radio, the construction workers, as one, stop whatever it is they are doing and sing along with great gusto.  It is quite the sight.  When the “opera” ends and the screaming Brian May guitar licks begin, the workers do the proper head-banging move to the song sometimes causing severe whiplash and nose bleeds. 

But if you ask, and you really should, they will tell you, “It is SO worth it.”

But when Queen did the song, they knew they could not replicate the “opera” on stage to the standard set by their studio version.  They had made the studio version, true, and they could have taken a stab at it or lip-synced it onstage but they chose to not insult the intelligence of the audience.  Freddie played that final chord on the piano and then they all left the stage and had a mind-blowing light show to the recording.  Then, they returned after for the rest of the song and it was a long time before any sort of order could be restored.

Which is how a rock concert is supposed to go.

This is another great reason to love Aerosmith.  The same five guys (albeit, the five “missing years”) that started are the same five guys that are still there.  Although, my son, who is really into the video game Guitar Hero, came to me after playing the new Aerosmith version of the game and asked me why, oh, why did Aerosmith do Walk This Way with Run-D.M.C?  I felt this was an excellent time to expound on the long-term damage of drug use as this recording was the very best example I have ever seen.

The Rolling Stones have had some personnel changes.  The addition of Ronnie Woods has proven successful in part, I believe, because he is the love child of Mick Jagger and Keith Richards.  Bass player Darryl Jones has been with the band for a very long time and can be most distinguished from the original bassist Bill Wyman in that Mr. Jones appears to be sober at least part of the time. 

But drop Mick Jagger, Keith Richards or Charlie Watts and you no longer have The Rolling Stones.  I can’t imagine how much they would have to shorten the name of the band without the triad but I have a feeling it would be spelled with only vowels.

Paul McCartney shows proper respect.  In concert he does not do Beatles songs that John Lennon wrote.  He could and I’m sure he would do them well.  But it wouldn’t be right. 

The only time I saw Paul McCartney do a Beatles song he had not written was at a concert just after George Harrison had died.  He came out onstage with a ukulele.  He told us George was a great fan of the instrument and had given Paul the one he was about to play.  With the backdrop showing photos of George, Paul performed an extremely poignant Something in tribute to the “little brother” he had recently lost.

That’s respect.

And speaking of Respect, if anyone ever tries to re-record the Otis Redding song that Aretha Franklin made her own, well, I would dearly love to have ringside seats for the tail-whuppin’ Ms. Franklin will deliver to your sorry behind.

Because, you see, it just isn’t right to mess with any Queen.